It is a common aspect of modern life to emphasize our independence. At its positive, this can mean taking control of our health, income, and confidence. It means that we are trying harder than ever before not to rely on others for our emotional, physical, or financial well being. But it can be easy for this message to become corrupted. Independence should not mean isolation. Independence should also never mean that we feel guilty or hesitant in admitting we have a problem or need support. If we have taken independence to mean that we will never need help, then we could be setting ourselves up for a fall. Independence helps us to deepen our self-reliance and become more resourceful. But it can be an expression of our independence to take control of our situation by asking for help. It is important to be able to distinguish between a problem you can solve yourself and one that requires some added input. Browse the headings below to discover the times when you need to seek support.
You Need Expertise
If a particular problem goes beyond your area of expertise, it may be time to seek support. We can always address gaps in our own knowledge and try to improve our understanding of the situation. But sometimes, there simply isn’t the time or capacity for us to become an expert. It’s rarely possible in a short space of time and it’s almost never necessary. An example of times when we might need to seek support are in times when we need the advice or legal or medical professionals. It is rare that we could handle our own divorce single-handedly, for example. We might not know what avenues to pursue in complicated legal issues such as will disputes or cosmetic surgery claims. We might also need advice if we are seeking treatment for a serious illness. There are many times that we will have to rely on the knowledge of professionals. We need to understand that this is not an admission of defeat. Collaborating with others is empowering, not demeaning. If you’re lacking expertise in something, don’t hesitate to ask for advice.
Your Life Is Being Affected
We may have a problem that is very specific to one area of our life, such as a job issue or relationship difficulty. If these problems start to affect other areas of our life, it is a strong possibility that we should seek some support. However strong or resilient we are, problems can affect our health and well-being remarkably quickly. You may find that an ongoing dispute at work is affecting your ability to concentrate or even harming your appetite, for example. You may find that worries about your finances are affecting the quality of your sleep or putting a strain on your relationship. Problems and concerns are a necessary part of life. But allowing their influence to spill over into your quality of life is not something you have to stand for. If you find that a specific problem is now affecting several areas of your life, it’s time to achieve some balance by getting objective support. It might include a trip to the doctor or the bank, discussing things with a professional, or communicating with a partner. Whatever form support takes, it is time to take action.
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