When Things Just Aren’t Working Out

When Things Just Aren't Working Out

You’re lucky if most things in your life work out. We don’t mean to put a damper on things before the article has even properly started, but, it’s true! There are so many things that go wrong, and so many curve balls that life just seems to want to throw at us throughout our years. But the one thing we seem to struggle with the most is our relationships. Love is a terrible but wonderful thing. Every time you fall for someone, and every time someone falls for you, there’s always a chance that someone is going to get hurt. Whether that be you, or them, it’s still going to happen. But as humans, we can’t help but fall in love at some point in our lives. We live to be loved, and we love to love. But if you’re going through a breakup at the minute, or you know one is about to happen, then you need to be prepared with things to do when things just aren’t working out. We’re going to try and make the whole process easier, so follow the bits of advice we have below for you.

Be Respectful

This is something you should always be mindful of, especially if you’re the one who is breaking up with your other half. There’s going to be so many different emotions involved, some of which are going to be hard to deal with. So, try and keep things as civil as possible. You know how easy it is to say things you don’t mean when in the middle of an argument, but imagine how easy it’s going to be when actually breaking up! You should also try and be respectful of their time and space, especially if you’re still living together at the time of the breakup. Sometimes it’s not so easy for one of you to just pack a bag and leave, which can lead to awkwardness around the home. If children are involved, things get even more complicated. You should both be respectful of their feelings, making sure that they’re unaware that anything has changed. When the time’s right, you’ll be able to tell them. But there’s nothing worse than letting them see all of the anger and confusion that you two are feeling. If your partner is not being respectful of your feelings, which often times they won’t be. Then try and distance yourself as much as possible. The age old thing to do is cut contact completely, but we know it’s sometimes not as easy as that. If needs be however, both of you need to be strong enough to block each other with all forms of contact for a while. At least until the hot water has cooled.

Organizing Things

If you lived together, and had a family together, then things are going to be complicated, especially if you had a mortgage. The best thing you can do is seek help from a legal adviser, to find out what to do about both the mortgage and the custody of the children. The mortgage is going to be the hardest to sort. It should be in both of your names. If not, then things might be a little easier. If it’s in his name for example, he has ownership of the house, the only thing you need to make sure you get back is the things that you’ve actually bought. If the relationship ends civil, this will be easy to solve. If the mortgage is in both of your names, then you need to figure out who is going to stay, and who needs to move out. You then need to figure out if one of you is going to have a settlement, which the one keeping the house will have to pay. Trust us, the process of getting everything changes is going to be long. Don’t even get us started on how frustrating it’s going to be if you were married. The divorce process is long, and one not a lot of people like going through due to the constant back and forth.

If Things Get Ugly

If things get uglySo, we’ve talked about how it might not be smooth sailing along the way. It really is easy for things to get a little ugly along the way. If they do, it’s important that you yourself try and remain dignified with it all. If it was you splitting up with your partner, it’s going to be so easy for them to act out of anger. So many men make mistakes when dealing with a breakup, so much so that it can lead you to resenting and actually even hating them. If things get so out of hand the verbal or physical abuse is constant, you can look at how to stop father visitation rights if necessary. The last thing you would want is for your children to get involved, or even be influenced if they’re old enough, by what your partner is saying. The more time they spend around a poisonous atmosphere, the more resentment they’re going to feel. But, at the end of the day, limiting their visitation rights, or stopping them altogether, is going to have a direct impact on your children’s lives.  Always make sure you’re making the right decision for yourself, but remember the direct impact it might have on your children.

Focusing On You

Once all of the logistics and the legalities are over, it’s important to start focusing on you. For the first time in probably years, you’re going to actually be able to do this. The more you focus on your, the happier you’ll realize that you’ll become. Get out and about with friends that you might not have been able to see before, and fill your life with experiences you might never have had. Take care of yourself by hitting the gym and eating right, and go through an all round glow up. This is where a transformation takes place that allows you to become the best person you can be, both inside and out.

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